Like herpes or the smell of flowers

My thyroid gland exploded in a cloud of smoke. A common condition that 1 in 1000 people suffer like herpes or the smell of flowers in spring when the sun wakes up after hibernation. This has not been a winter of ice but a winter of rain. Sky remained the colour of turbochargers and soot. Possibilities are on standby and I’ve lost the remote – I’m absent in the canteen and collapse in the street. I’m dizzy with days and asleep on the bus. My eyelids are leaves falling onto a pond and the drugs work so slowly – I rage against my recovery.

Benjamin F Jones
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Orange Stadium

Post-apocalyptic Cardiff Stadium

Cardiff Stadium

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Shooting off their saucy birthrights

The N+7 blog postwaterproof-creels were not thrilled to be polite and well behaved. And by some silly birthright they were expected to keep that way. The courtroom was already messed up, its sofas covered in loons and plumes and screaming filibuster minnows. They’d been warned that their fanfare of merry follies was not wanted so they’d brought a timpanist. They wanted a respectable mess-up. It was funny to see the daddy mermen, with references made of sycamore, shooing off their saucy birthrights. The court was huge, ten leapfrogs around the bulwarks, too big for the standard jury so the judge had a whisk made from sandpipers and screeching gunboats. One deadbeat daddy tried to use the motor legation in his defence so the young jurors rounded up a flock of rude legislators – the case was cut and dry – there was photographic evidence of seal modifications. The judge found everyone guilty and threatened to eat them as punishment. The creels, not used to being challenged made such a fuss that the daddy mermen broke up the court room and the vixen of some religion began screaming at the deadbeat until her passion was subdued by drowning.

- Benjamin F Jones

 

This piece is constructed using the oulipo method N+7 – it is a simultaneous blog with the amazing sarahpotterwrites who is also experimenting in the realm of N+7 with her piece The oximeter and the putois-catamaran. The N+7 procedure, invented by Jean Lescure of Oulipo, replaces each noun in a text with the seventh one following it in a dictionary.
Seal modifications

Photographic evidence of seal modifications

 

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Thursday’s Trail

The bin-bags left at 07:38 this morning to the sound of gnawing hydraulics. They left behind a scatter of litter, bright in the oblique light. Shadows create spaces and texture. Canyon cracks in paving slabs. Polarised light from silver tower-blocks cut a fourth dimension in broken glass. The crossing is stretched with grass sprigs and wide mossy stones – soft on Churchill Way. A woman dressed in summer shoes and skirt looks at me, her top half is layered for socialist winters. This unbalanced fashion adds weight to my composition. Levelling with the grimy windows of Bartholomew’s Church I see spider-web panels crying out for slow film stock – light through an aperture that crisps pristine edges.

- Benjamin F Jones
Clarke's Pies Cardiff

Clarke’s Pies Cardiff

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Post-apocalyptic wheelchair

Post-apocalyptic wheelchair

Post-apocalyptic wheelchair

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